my essay need edit to clearly answer and meet what the school ask in bulletin points.
I upload my personal statement (personalstate.docx).
I had let some people read my essay and attached an example of one of the people that read my essay and edit it. the example paragraph i include in JPG file clearly state the purpose of motivation. It is an example of what i meant to clearly answer and meet the bulletin points.
it need to be 4000 characters including space.
**Statement of PURPOSE in JPG file is the admission essay guideline and must be answered clearly if i were to read it.

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